Day 14 March 30th

I was so tired when I woke up today! I barely made it through my workout.  All day long I was fuzzy headed and somewhat depressed. I really struggled 😦

God time today had me drawn to my daily devotional which was again in Ps 47.  Sometimes we get so desperate that we just need to cry out “save me”. We don’t know how to pray or what we need but we just know we can’t do this on our own. This Psalm so much aligns with the pain and agony that Job describes in his writing.  I feel that sometimes we are taught not to question God or not to cry out to him with our real thoughts and feelings but over and over again, the men and women in God’s word do this. So real with their struggle, even when it is raw, unfiltered emotion.  

This reminds me of a time when someone I know  was at the darkest point of his depression, he was in the basement of his home and he was just screaming out to God in desperation, anger, sadness and hopelessness.  At the time it was terrifying but as time went on he saw how integral that was for his healing journey. I am so thankful that we serve a God who cares about our successes, and our failures, our highs and lows and is there for us when we are cultivating and pursuing a strong relationship with him as well as when we are in the deepest, darkest pit cursing Him.  Remember to turn to him no matter what is in your heart!  

It felt like I did nothing today since I was having issues focusing.  But I did catch up on some work stuff, did some online shopping for spring break activities for the kids, watched the president and governor of Indiana and updated our April calendar! 🙂

In the evening we decided to try target drive up service.  It was so easy and quick and no human contact at all! I would do it again!  When we got in the car to leave to go to Target we loaded up on all our protection of sanitizing wipes, sanitizer and Aaron even joked by putting on a mask. Alaina said she missed the car, the kids have not been in a car for two weeks! When we started down the road she opened her window and was yelling into the wind “I need fresh air!” She was cracking us up! Funny but a little sad at the same time.

While we were out we drove around town to see how busy/not busy it was.  It seems people are staying home! There was significantly less traffic than normal and so many empty parking lots. We even went to one of our favorite parks to see what it was like there. There were actually about 8 cars around and lots of people running or riding bikes and one family playing on the playground equipment, despite the sign on the lawn saying “ALL PARKS CLOSED”. The kids could not understand why their parents wouldn’t protect their kids. I couldn’t either.
On our ride home the topic of school came up and we talked about how we most likely would not be returning and there were some pretty upset kids.  We processed all the things they would miss out on and this led to them worrying about summer plans as well.  

When we got home we tried out the girls new nail art kit.  It was fun to take some time to do our nails and laugh a bit.  Parker even wanted to try it! Aaron declined :/ 

Nancy warned us that we should order enough groceries for the month ofApril.  She said that they are sharing reports that make it seem that food will be scarce soon. I have not done my research on this but I will honor her wishes and order lots of food! No problem:) 

Final thoughts: I have really been thinking of the healthcare workers and first responders in our country and the major sacrifices they are making.  Many of them are choosing to live away from their family to keep them safe and they really have no choice but to work and help us all! I am so grateful that we have such highly trained health professionals and that are willing to risk their own lives to save ours every minute of the day and first responders that won’t even bat an eye when it comes to keeping us safe.  One of my kids asked what if they decided to stay home to be safe? Wow! What a big question. We would be totally screwed! That’s what! Please take the time to thank them in any way you can! I think this is true in all countries right now. Let’s not take this for granted!

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