Camping went well other than the kids didn’t get to sleep until after midnight! The couch was not too bad 🙂 This morning I started my run a little later so I could enjoy the day light. It was BEAUTIFUL! It was about 30 degrees but the sun was bright and full! I ran an extra 2 miles for a grand total of 5 miles:) I love the feeling of a relaxing long run ❤️
Today I read Job’s response to his friend who had once again condemned him as an evil man. I finally realized why his friends were so stuck on the idea that if bad things were happening to you then that means that you must be a bad person or have sin in your life. I believe this is what the general belief was in that culture and during that time. In this chapter Job is realizing that this theory is flawed and explains to his friend that even an evil man can have a good life and is experiencing himself, as a very righteous man who trusts in God, that he is undergoing a great deal of pain and hardship. He tries to explain this to his friends to hopefully get them to understand that his suffering is not a result from any hidden sin or from him being a wicked man.
We moved camp outside for the day and the kids played out in the tent and in the playhouse for several hours. It was even nice enough for them to eat lunch out there. After a while they came in and took their turns playing Animal Crossing. Later in the day the kids rode their bikes for our walk and Parker was “doing tricks” by driving his bike off the sidewalk curb:)
We finally got the food for the bearded dragon (Clouse). We had to order them through the mail to avoid going into the pet store so it took a little longer than we liked. Aaron placed him in the whole bucket to let him eat and he was in heaven! LOL!
I made sure to tune in to the Governor today. He had some very important information to share about schools. He said that we will not be returning to school this school year. This is something my kids were fearing. They will continue to do distance learning and for my job we will continue to do e-leaning but from the sounds of it the seniors will mostly be finished and granted credits. This will mean a lot of work for me and my fellow counselors in the next week.
I am saddened and relieved that this decision was made. I was starting to wonder if I would have to make a hard choice of not sending my kids back to school which would mean I would need to take off work. But it all worked out, although my kids are heartbroken. I think this will give them a new appreciation for school! I am also disappointed that I won’t get to see the joy in the faces of the seniors as they end their final school year. I really do miss my students!
At dinner time we discussed what the kids thought about not going back to school and what the hardest part of this was for them. Addie was sad to not see her friends and named several things they will miss activity wise, including the fact that they had not even gotten to play one game of kickball yet. Alaina said that she was going to miss not having Jog-a-thon (the school’s biggest and most fun fundraiser of the year) and her friends. Parker also said Jog-a-thon and his friends and they all said they will miss their teacher!
The number of cases and deaths is growing more and more each day. It feels like we are running as fast as we can to get away from this virus but it is gaining on us quickly and soon it will catch us and devour us. It is a frightening feeling. Like I feel terror thinking about the number of people in our nation that will probably die this month and next. Not just our nation but locally. Right now, in our county, our numbers seem low because they are not testing many people yet but once they are able to test everyone, I believe our community will be shocked. When we start to get more deaths, this will really hit home because it will be people we know!
Final thoughts and challenge: With each day that goes by I cannot explain my amazement in all of this. I experience many feelings each day. I feel gratefulness, anxiety, grief, fear of what the future holds, frustration, anger, confusion and back to gratefulness. It is just so strange what all of this can do to your psyche. I cannot be the only one going through these stages of emotions.
The oddest thing to me is, despite all these emotions and thoughts each day, I have this constant steadfast feeling of hope and calm. I know deep down everything will be okay and this too will pass but at the surface my mind says otherwise. I am thankful that I have my faith (God), my healthy lifestyle habits and a secure family to lean on and get me through this time. What are you leaning on? Are you experiencing this mess of emotion too? What are you doing to cope?