Day 82 June 6th

Today was my long run day so I ran 6 miles. I wanted to go a couple more miles but I decided to sleep in a little so it was pretty hot and muggy by time I got out the door to run, so I stuck with my planned 6.  I was so tired from not getting much sleep because we got to bed so late from going to the drive in movies!  I was so excited later in the morning to do power yoga with my fitness group and my cousin joined me! We met on the porch with our mats and made sure we stayed at a social distance! Many other group members had a guest as well. It was so fun to see everyone live! 

During my God time this morning I was journaling and praying for God to work in the area of my life that causes me to want to be productive every moment of every day. The part of me that has a hard time stopping to enjoy a moment or to have good judgment of what is really more important, the task at hand or the child who needs my attention. The part of me that ignores when I should be spending time with my kids in order to get one more project done and the part of me that neglects my husband over and over in order to keep moving forward on housework. I asked him to give me eyes to see these opportunities and, especially today, to know when to stop and enjoy the moments in my life with my family. 

This afternoon I worked on mowing and some more lawn work in the backyard. I did this while kids spent time with their cousins on facetime. 

When Addie was done, she came outside where I was mowing and sat on the swing. I kept glancing at her as I mowed passed her and she looked so sad and so lonely. I know she is really struggling with life not being normal and missing her friends and family so I have been trying to check in with her and keep an eye on her.  With the recient rise of depression and suicide of kids her age I must be sure that she is okay and that I am diligent in making sure to address her emotions and needs. 

In this moment I could tell she needed some attention. I attempted to ask Siri to call Aaron to have him spend some alone time with her while I finished the yard but it was not working, then suddenly I had the urge to stop mowing and go to her to spend time with her myself.  I know this is probably second nature to others, but for me it’s so hard. I decided to listen. I walked over to her, put one of my air pods in her ear and started to push her on the swing as we listened to praise and worship music together. 

After a few minutes she stopped swinging and then a great, upbeat praise song came on and we began dancing together!  As I swirled her around and dipped her down, I could see the smile return to her face and her eyes light up. I knew at this moment I had heard the voice of God and I had been obedient to his prompting.  We danced for a little while longer before Alaina came out wanting Addie for something. So as Addie ran inside, I began to cry. I thanked the Lord for the special moment that I would have missed out on if I had not listened and kept working! Later Addie came back out to tell me thank you for dancing with her. I could tell she was just as blessed as I was! 

In the evening we had a quick dinner and headed to a local county park.  Earlier in the day my cousin had mentioned that they planned to go on a hike later and invited us to go along. This was an activity we could enjoy while social distancing so I talked to Aaron about it and we decided to go. We are trying to find things to do that are safe but also where we can be social! We had a great time. It was later in the evening so the park was not busy at all! However on the trails we all got bitten up pretty bad because the mosquitoes were out and very hungry! Because of this we decided to leave the trails and check out the beach. Just as we approached the beach, every last person had left! We had it all to ourselves so it was very easy to keep our distance and spread out. 

My cousin and I used this time and safe environment to begin teaching the kids about social distance and what to do if another child or adult gets too close to them. The kids did a great job! We need to do this for when they return to school in the fall. The guidelines for schools came out this week and social distancing is one thing they will need to do while in school. 

I know we all hate the idea of having to stay away from others but the kids figured out a way to make it work! They were able to build a sandcastle with their cousins and maintain a social distance and all the kids had a blast. They were so happy to be out of the house doing something fun! My heart was full as I watched them dig and play and I visited with my cousin.

Final thoughts and challenge: Tonight after the kids were in bed Aaron asked me how much did I get completed on my priority list today. He was referring to a conversation we had earlier about me stressing out about getting it all complete by the end of the day. I felt ashamed when I said I only got two things done, however later as I reflected I actually got something so much more rewarding completed!

I realized that God answered my prayers from this morning! I wrote in my prayer journal “Please help me to connect with my kids today. Please help me to stay focused on you and not to rush life but to slow down and take moments to enjoy the people and events around me”. God showed me ways I could do these things and more importantly I listened and obeyed! I feel like today was a win even though I was unable to cross things off my list. I gained so much more through making the choice to dance with Addie and to go to the park with my family. WIN! 

If you struggle like I do, maybe you can look for opportunities today to stop productivity and spend time with someone you love.  Maybe you can plan time instead of plan projects. Maybe it would help to resolve that today will be a day of relationships and relaxation and no productivity is required. I am going to try this!

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